Friday, June 24, 2016

19 Weeks and Pregnanting All Wrong

I gave in today.  As I sit here, my pants are being held together with a rubber band.  Oh, I can still zip them up if I really want to.  But breathing has overridden my vanity.  I've just begun week 19 of my mutation, transformation, production expansion.  I have to say, it hasn't been at all what I expected.  In fact, it's been pretty damn easy so far.  I want to punch myself in the face for even typing that sentence out.  And I'm pretty sure I've just cosmically jinxed myself.  And yet, there it is.

In fact, I hadn't realized how worried I was about not having many symptoms, until my last checkup when I started bawling while lying on the exam table listening to his little heartbeat and having my Doc reassure me that all was well.  I simply hadn't felt pregnant.  And it worried me.  Everything I'd been reading was telling me how difficult and wretched everything was supposed to be.  Especially for a woman like me, who is "advanced age-high risk".

Here's what I have experienced:
  • I've had heartburn a couple of times.
  • My boobs KILLED during the first trimester and I winced every night as I'd attempt to remove my bra without making booby contact.
  • I have to pee every 17 minutes.  Sometimes sooner. 
I've already gained 10lbs.  So that's super supes.  I'm 5'6 and pre-prego was a hardy 135lbs.  Doc isn't concerned so neither am I.  Yet.

Haven't gotten around to taking the 19 week pic yet. I'm at the awkward stage where I don't quite look pregnant but rather like I just ate the entire dessert section of a Vegas buffet.  Twice.

Um.  Yeah.  So far, that's kind of it.  I have a theory though.  I'm thinking that all those years and years of having miserably painful periods where I was curled into a fetal ball of agony is making this feel like a snap.  That, combined with the fact that I no longer wake up with the familiar caress of my years long companion, the hangover, I'm feeling pretty damn good.  Who knew?

I have had one major, annoying, inconvenience.  I cry.  Like, for the most asinine reasons.  Let's use some more bullet points!
  • I recently went to St. George for the weekend and I cried because I missed my dog. 
  • I read a news article where a 12 year old girl accidentally ran a marathon.  Which clearly calls for tears.
  • Getting dressed the other morning, I realized I was down to one last bra that actually fit.  I plopped down in front of my closet and bawled.  And then cried again on my way to work because crying had made me late. 
  • Someone on FB posted an obituary for a woman in Cincinnati I'd never known or even heard of.  I burst into tears because she was dead. 
  • Gordon Ramsey hugged someone on Kitchen Nightmares.  I ugly cried. 
I have an ultrasound appointment on Monday.  I have to drink 32oz. of fluid an hour before my appointment.  I'll probably pee myself.  And then cry.