Thursday, May 2, 2013

Group Project. What Is This New Hell?

I'm telling you right now, this post is gonna be one big discombobulated mess.  I'm home sick from work today which means I don't feel good (I know it should be "I don't feel well" but I like good better) which also means this probably won't make much sense and I just.  don't.  care. 

Speaking of work and not caring, (totally smooth segue) we just had our yearly week long conference thingie.  This year it was actually held here in Salt Lake.  Peeps from all over the world showed up to see the mother ship and where all the glorious software development magic goes down.  It seemed there was a constant stream of strangers being paraded through every day.  I finally got to meet a lot of people I e-mail and talk to on a daily basis but had never actually seen.

There were lunch and dinner invitations.  There was an opening gala, and an experience "Big Adventure Utah" with an indoor designated area for snowball fights, a camp site with fire pit, rock climbing walls, live band, dancing but most importantly, wine.  Lots of wine.

And oh yeah, there was this guy.


By the end of the week, I was tapped out.  I even bailed on the last dinner and lunch invites which I still feel pretty crappy about.  I just couldn't do it anymore and I didn't really understand why.  I've known for years that I'm an introvert and not very good at voluntarily being social, but when it's important to me, I'll try to fake it the best that I can.  But it takes it toll.  I was physically drained.  So, what does one do to try to better understand why they're screwed up?  You google it!

And then it all made sense...


 This made so much sense to me and perfectly explained why I'd feel so exhausted after meeting with people all day, then socializing at night.  It wasn't that I didn't like everyone I was meeting and spending time with, it was just so draining and without my evenings to be alone to re-charge, I didn't hold up very well.

I very clearly and very badly NEED this t-shirt.
Mid post interruption...Erik just walked in.  He works from home, not sure if I've ever mentioned that before.

Erik:  Ginger, I'm bored!  Wanna take your top off and do jumping jacks?
Me:  You're an idiot.
Erik:  Soo, is that a no?

So umm... where was I going with this?  I'm not sure if it's any easier to be an extrovert.  It sure as hell looks like a lot more fun as evidenced by one of my very favorite extroverts who thoroughly enjoyed herself at every event.

If you never hear from me again it's because Cindy read this post, saw this picture, and killed me.  Dead.
Cindy is one of my favorite people.  She has this amazing way of making the mundane fun and bringing out the crazy in those around her.  The good kind of crazy.  Not the crazy kind of crazy.  Plus, she understands me.  Just the other day, we had lunch plans with a few other people.  The "few others" turned into a group of 10.  So I bailed out.  She was not offended and later that day sent me this, saying "This one's for you Dawn":

Everyone needs a Cindy in their life. 

Before anyone starts thinking that I'm a completely anti-social, people hating recluse, (fine, sometimes I am) I do leave my safety bubble and venture out on occasion.  I'm just extra particular about who I decide to venture out with.   And I don't think that's a bad thing at all.










44 comments:

  1. I really don't like hanging out with people anymore (but then again, I don't think I ever did). I like being alone - but that doesn't mean I occasionally don't appreciate the company of others. On my own terms.

    Also, hope you feel better soon :)!

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    1. EXACTLY!!!! And in small doses.

      Thank you Annika. :)

      Delete
  2. It's not that I don't like people in general, I just don't so much care for the general population...

    Sometimes I withdraw and just don't want to be bothered. Is that really a bad thing? I think not. Hope you feel better soon. Love the guy on the stilts. Think of how he felt after all of that.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. I like people one on one. It's when it becomes a lot of people all at once that I want to make a run for it.

      He was an interesting character. I can't imagine doing his job. *shudder*

      Delete
    2. I wonder if he went home and had a meltdown too, because of all of the people he had to deal with. Surely some of them got in his way and wouldn't move or something just as annoying. If he kicked them with a stilt it might be a long way down

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    3. Seriously! I was afraid to even brush up against him thinking it would topple him right over.

      Delete
  3. I came by to say hi to you and complain like I always do. I used to be a major extrovert, now I'm afraid of damn near everyone so not so much anymore. I hope you are feeling better because you are a tour guide tomorrow. :)

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    1. SHIIIIIIIIT!!!!! Awesome. I'm gonna shake hands with everyone and not use sanitizer. Yay for more strangers parading through!

      Telling me what's going on with you and your life isn't the same as complaining Matt.

      Delete
  4. V!!!!!!!
    Where ya been? (Where've I been? I know....)
    I just wanted to cry, hug you, go off and be alone for 12 hours after reading this post because
    ME TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

    I'd be interested in taking a poll of all the bloggers that identify with the introvert 'way'. I felt like Sally Field, reading this, 'You GET me. You REALLY GET me!!"

    People wear.me.out. Thankfully Hubs understands this now. I don't want constant togetherness (Stab me.). I can't do back-to-back-to-back gatherings/socials without taking a mental health day.

    I'm serious.

    Your post sparks my wanting to do a post about this and I will TOTALLY link to your awesome self because you are just awesome.

    We are kindred introverts. By ourselves. For a limited time of fellowship. BAAAA HAAA HAAAA! And I NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED that t-shirt! Where can I get it?

    P.S. I LOVED the jumping jacks, interlude. Your Hubs and mine would get along swimmingly (my husband works for himself from home too, so I can also relate to the conundrum of wanting to come home and hibernate and significant other wanting to GO somewhere, anywhere, just get me outta the house.)

    HUGS!!

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    1. Carrie!!

      This entire comment made me smile. I'm willing to bet 9 out of 10 bloggers are introverted. Typing away behind the safety of our laptops is definitely the preferred method of communication.

      I hope you DO create a post about this, I'd love to read it!

      I saw the t-shirt on Pinterest but the page it was originally linked to is not longer available. I'll have to do some research because I seriously want it. Maybe I'll get two and do an introvert giveaway. I dunno though, that may take some effort.

      You really have to let me know if you're ever in Salt Lake. The men can commiserate about their anti-social women and we can sit around sipping wine not talking if we don't feel like it. :D

      Delete
  5. Once upon a time, I thought I was an extrovert. But now I just don't friggin know. Is this something that can change on a daily basis?

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    1. I don't see why not? So many aspects of who we are change throughout the years, why not our social propensities?

      Delete
  6. Hello, my name is TriGirl and I am an introvert. Always have been, always will be. And now that it is finally being explained I don't feel as much like there is something wrong with it. Also, I think it's hilarious that we are all finding out about each other (introverts that is) because we can communicate online by being social, but in our own homes, without having to be around other people, talking out loud to one another.

    Also hilarious? Erik. He's a keeper.

    Final also: I totally need that shirt.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. HAHAHA!!!! Hello TriGirl. Welcome to the club. For a LONG time I felt like it was a really negative thing that I just needed to get over. That's not going to happen and now I know why and know it's just fine.

      Erik is a keeper. I dig him.

      I'm going to find it dammit!!

      Delete
  7. Never was my introversion more clear than when I went to my family's house for Christmas and realized, "oh crap, there's a lot of people here, I gotta get outta here!" Then I made it my job to have to be an extrovert, and that sucks.
    Also, best mid-post interruption ever. That was hilarious.

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    1. That sounds like when I met a bunch of Erik's family last year. I had to bail and hid out in the truck reading for about a half hour before I felt like I could manage it a bit more.

      Your job...WHYYYYYYY? Why would you DO that?? That's a nightmare!

      He has his moments.

      Delete
  8. When I was a kid, my best friend was and still is a huge introvert. I had to have people and he could barely tolerate people. I'd go over to his house every day. Sometimes he felt like talking. Other times not. If he didn't feel like talking then he'd just say nothing. If he didn't feel like having me over he wouldn't say so, he'd just ignore me. It took me years to realize that the only way to interact with him was to figure out whether he wanted to anyway, and then figure out what he felt like talking about. If I hit on the wrong subjects he just said nothing and kept watching TV or staring into his computer. If I hit on the right subjects he'd turn and start talking excitedly about whatever it was - Cubs baseball, fantasy football, when will the Cowboys quit sucking, etc. I'm still not very good at interacting with an introvert. I know he has a few other friends who are better at entertaining him than I am. But it has taken me a lifetime to be as good at it as I am.

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    1. The cool thing is, you didn't just peg him a freaking crackpot fruitcake and give up on him. We all need extroverts who understand us and will help get us out of our comfort zones...every once in awhile.

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  9. I am the CRAZY bandana chic in the picture. I want to tell all of you introverts that I think you are awesome!! And the reason why is because you have the ability to write like no others can. I can't write worth crap....that's because I say everything right to your face. So I say to you all...stand up and be proud...because if it weren't for you guys...us extroverts would not have these awesome blogs to read.

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    1. Oh my Cindy-Lou-Who. I honestly can't tell you enough how much I absolutely adore you.

      Delete
  10. Oh! Thank God I read this. Here I am an introvert and all along I just thought I just hated people.
    You know, I used to be known for my extroversion, for my "friendliness." Now, I mostly just want to be alone to write. I don't know WTF happened, but whatever: I is what I is. And you are who you are, and that's why we're here. :)

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    1. I'm actually kind of surprised. I would have thought you were the 1 in 10 blogger who was more extroverted. But yeah, what you said, and that makes you awesome. Well that and your super awesome name. :)

      Delete
  11. It doesn't sound too well that you're not feeling good. A yearly week long conference thingie... no wonder you're not feeling good. Just the thought of it makes me wanna eat backwards. Cindy don't kill her. Just give her some aspirin, will ya? ;)

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    1. Oh yeah definitely. I've had plenty of time to hide out in my cave and recuperate alone with my laptop.

      Delete
    2. Good. Now here's what I wanted to say: "What! Still no new post! How in the freaking hell on this freaking planet or anywhere else am I going to get through this day now?!" But now it looks kind of silly. Kind of...

      Delete
  12. I think most people are introverts thrown into extrovert situations. We survive one way or another.

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  13. Yeah, I'm an introvert too. Wait, no I'm not. I'm the complete opposite of that.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Oh I loved this post!! (From a safe Annoymous cyber distance away from your bubble) I found myself completely relating to all the material here... Ok most of it. The creepy dude on stilts gave me the shivers.

    I recently told one of my aquaintances that kept badgering me to hang out: I'd love to but I'm keeping to just a small circle of friends right now and nothing personal but you're not one of them.

    You can totally use that if you need to.

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    1. A coworker that attended the soiree has a phobia of creepy dudes on stilts. She about had an aneurysm every time he ventured too close. I couldn't help but laugh loudly.

      But it's okay.

      She's the new girl.

      Delete
  15. Ooh, I loved this post! I relate to it exactly. I had heard the theory of extroverts/introverts and energy and always agreed with it, but I especially like how it was put in that cartoon you posted. I really liked that quote, too.

    I love people, I really do, but man I need to get home and recharge, which is why I barely talk to my neighbors. They must think I'm a snot. I just can't, though.

    I've also canceled on events like you did, because I couldn't deal with the crowd I knew would be there. We just have to remember that it's okay to pick and choose where we want to spend our energy.

    Fantastic post...I love you all the more :)

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    1. And I love YOU all the more for not thinking I'm a total asshole.

      It really is about how and who you decide to invest your energy in because it's most definitely limited.

      Delete
  16. A blog post that is a discombobulated mess? That's my specialty! That's all I ever write. But yours are more interested and entertaining than mine.

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  17. I think I used to be an introvert as well but I saw it as a greater advantage to be an extrovert, so over a course of a few years I became and enjoyed being an extrovert.

    I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with being an introvert, but I prefer being able to have things go my way and make things happen. And unfortunately, the only way to deal with obnoxious assholes is to be an extrovert. Assholes seem to like preying on introverts for some reason.

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    1. I'm glad you were able to make a conscious decision on which personality trait you prefer.

      If I had that choice, I'd definitely choose to be an extrovert as well.

      Delete
  18. I have been waiting, waiting, and waiting to read The Dream Thieves. Now I am even more impatient for it. So cool

    that you had the idea of dream thieves floating around for so long. It must feel good to take something that you

    thought was useless and make it better.

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    1. Just take a step back and fuck your own face.

      Delete
  19. OK, the blog world is getting lonely and stale. I'm missing your particular brand of smart-assed wackiness. How can I persuade you to come back and write some more? I have wine. And chocolate. In fact, I have a bottle of chocolate wine around here somewhere.

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    1. Awww shucks. *kicks dirt* What a sweet comment. Honestly, I've been meaning to post the last couple of weekends but every time I open up the laptop to get started, I realize I don't really wanna.

      So I don't. Cause I'm a grownup and do what I want. Or don't want.

      Delete
  20. A blog on introverts...I love it!

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    1. An introverted blogger. Who'd have thought? :)

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