Thursday, May 2, 2013

Group Project. What Is This New Hell?

I'm telling you right now, this post is gonna be one big discombobulated mess.  I'm home sick from work today which means I don't feel good (I know it should be "I don't feel well" but I like good better) which also means this probably won't make much sense and I just.  don't.  care. 

Speaking of work and not caring, (totally smooth segue) we just had our yearly week long conference thingie.  This year it was actually held here in Salt Lake.  Peeps from all over the world showed up to see the mother ship and where all the glorious software development magic goes down.  It seemed there was a constant stream of strangers being paraded through every day.  I finally got to meet a lot of people I e-mail and talk to on a daily basis but had never actually seen.

There were lunch and dinner invitations.  There was an opening gala, and an experience "Big Adventure Utah" with an indoor designated area for snowball fights, a camp site with fire pit, rock climbing walls, live band, dancing but most importantly, wine.  Lots of wine.

And oh yeah, there was this guy.

By the end of the week, I was tapped out.  I even bailed on the last dinner and lunch invites which I still feel pretty crappy about.  I just couldn't do it anymore and I didn't really understand why.  I've known for years that I'm an introvert and not very good at voluntarily being social, but when it's important to me, I'll try to fake it the best that I can.  But it takes it toll.  I was physically drained.  So, what does one do to try to better understand why they're screwed up?  You google it!

And then it all made sense...

 This made so much sense to me and perfectly explained why I'd feel so exhausted after meeting with people all day, then socializing at night.  It wasn't that I didn't like everyone I was meeting and spending time with, it was just so draining and without my evenings to be alone to re-charge, I didn't hold up very well.

I very clearly and very badly NEED this t-shirt.
Mid post interruption...Erik just walked in.  He works from home, not sure if I've ever mentioned that before.

Erik:  Ginger, I'm bored!  Wanna take your top off and do jumping jacks?
Me:  You're an idiot.
Erik:  Soo, is that a no?

So umm... where was I going with this?  I'm not sure if it's any easier to be an extrovert.  It sure as hell looks like a lot more fun as evidenced by one of my very favorite extroverts who thoroughly enjoyed herself at every event.

If you never hear from me again it's because Cindy read this post, saw this picture, and killed me.  Dead.
Cindy is one of my favorite people.  She has this amazing way of making the mundane fun and bringing out the crazy in those around her.  The good kind of crazy.  Not the crazy kind of crazy.  Plus, she understands me.  Just the other day, we had lunch plans with a few other people.  The "few others" turned into a group of 10.  So I bailed out.  She was not offended and later that day sent me this, saying "This one's for you Dawn":

Everyone needs a Cindy in their life. 

Before anyone starts thinking that I'm a completely anti-social, people hating recluse, (fine, sometimes I am) I do leave my safety bubble and venture out on occasion.  I'm just extra particular about who I decide to venture out with.   And I don't think that's a bad thing at all.