Friday, September 16, 2011

I'm gonna random all over your face!

Fair warning. There is no rhyme or reason to this post. If you come away feeling confused, upset or dizzy, it's probably because of all the pot you've been smoking since you awoke this morning to your roommates promptings to wake and bake. Or it could be because this post sucks. Whatever. Tomato, tomahtoe. What you CAN get out of this post is a few new awesome blogs to follow.

Let's start with Tonya.  She can be found at Where Have all the Hobos Gone?
If you're nice and leave her some comment love she may reward/punish you with your very own cartooning.  Case in point:
I love that she dressed me better in the cartoon than I bother to in real life.  Even if she did feel the need to include the paper clips I try to pass off as bobby pins and the binder clips in lieu of a belt.  Yeah, I'm high class.

And then there's Pickleope who has been turning fellow bloggers into tangy, pickled delights for some time now.  He also likes to include random facts about the chosen pickled blogger which may or may not be true. 
"What, you've never seen an anthropomorphic stove attack with muffin-nunchucks? For the record, the drink in the brown paper bag is to conceal her beverage-of-choice as she conceals her own identity....not because she occasionally fakes being homeless.  Fun Fake Fact: The Ginja Ninja is the international Electronic Battleship champion of 2008, which makes her a huge celebrity in Japan. Unfortunately, yelling "B19, bitch!" just doesn't command as much respect in the English speaking world as much as we would all hope."

I giggled seeing my fiery pickle head about to be brained by the muffin nun-chucks.  I never stood a chance against my nemesis. The kitchen stove wins again.

And last but by no means least, is Joshua at Vive le Nerd.  He didn't draw a picture of me but he did give me an award.  I don't care how much of a douche canoe this makes me.  I LOVE blog awards and I love when blogs I love are recognized for being um, loved?  *sigh*  So I'm passing it on with 3 random facts and 3 blogs I love.
Fact #1 I was born in a Gremlin.  A  fact that I will expound upon more at the end of this post.  Oh I know, the anticipation is simply overwhelming.

Fact #2 I can touch my tongue to my nose, wiggle my ears and whistle while humming.  Oh yeah.  Are you horny yet?  I know I am!  Though, I could be mistaking horny for nauseous.  Moving on.

Fact #3 I rarely sneeze less than 3 times in a row.  Which really sucks for someone who hates snot.

And the 3 blogs I'm really digging this week are:

#1 Natalie from My Blog Is Boring. She's sarcastic, sometimes a little bitchy and painfully honest.  The trifecta of awesome.

#2 Rapunzel of Tales From The Tower.  She doesn't post often but when she does I find myself excited to catch up on her romantic woes and victories.

#3 Aleisha from She calls me "Mama Leisha".  I'm a pretty callous individual but for some reason her posts never fail to melt my mostly frozen heart and remind me that I do, possibly, have a soul.

Now, just one more thing.  I know, I know.  I'm as exhausted by this post as you are.  Possibly more but bear with me.  I was asked to be the featured writer for today over at Studio30Plus.  I wrote about the day my Mother brought me into this world.  I wrote about what should have been a beautiful, magical experience gone horribly HORRIBLY awry and became the shit show that is my birthday.  It explains a lot about me and the fact that sometimes, just sometimes, the parents really are to blame.

I'm kidding.

Kind of.


  1. Aww, i dig your blog too!!! I can't wait to come drink Kool Aid with you. You're teh bees knees.

    Also? I need you to email me the birth story - the formatting at the other site cut off the last few words of ever sentence and it's kind of like playing mad libs. But adult mad libs, because there's baby batter in the title.

  2. You deserve it, lady. And thanks for the blog recs. NEW READING!!!!

  3. Thanks for the new blogz to read! As if my reading list isn't long enough. SIGH. But I can get rid of some of the crap blogs I read. I'm not talking about this blog though.

  4. Muffin nun-chucks? Um, yes please. And the fact that you can touch your tongue to your nose, wiggle your ears and whistle while humming makes you so much cooler in my book. Especially if you can do them all at the same time.

  5. FYI - you are my favorite new blog (new to me anyway) by a long shot. You are very entertaining and a great writer. Who knew somebody in Utah could be cool? :)

  6. Strange, I can touch my tongue to my nose too.

  7. I might have to check these out, I probably will.

  8. Natalie- That's bizarre. I will send it to you tomorrow. I've been sipping, okay, guzzling the kool aid tonight and just typing this out is taking all my concentration.

    Joshua- You're as awesome as ever.

    Mandy_Fish- Every time I find a new blog to follow I'm a excited but at the same time I think, ah hell. ANOTHER one to try to keep up with? I think it's time to weed through my list as well.

    Hippo Brigade- If I could do all 3 at once, I would be the coolest person in the universe! But alas, it's not meant to be.

    Wow- Please refer to Hippo Brigade's comment. CLEARLY I am pretty effing cool. However, your comment just made my night. Thank you. Ass.

    Allen- Welcome to the club. Your dues can be sent directly to my account as I am the president as well as the treasurer.

    Dylanthulhu- They're worth the read. :)

  9. Wait wait wait wait, born in a Gremlin?? Love your random blogging, haha. If you have time or want this weekend, I am hosting my Storytellers Blog Hop (I know, shameless promotion) and would LOVE to have you a part of it. Jump over and check it out, I think you will like :)

  10. Hahaha!! I love that you were born in a Pea Soup Green Gremlin! Epic! (The formatting cut the last few words off -- but I think I figured it out...) :)

    I will for sure check out those other blogs! :)

  11. TexaGermaNadian- I just linked up. I love the idea. I get so sick of the giveaway hops or beauty reviews that don't actually SAY anything. Thanks for letting me know about it!

    KSK- Ugh. Isn't that so gross? Who DOES that?
    Natalie had some issues with the words being cut off too. Not sure what the problem is. :(

  12. Just popped over from the tea party! Enjoyed laughing my way through your post!

  13. I'm not all that sure about Hippo Brigade's credibility. You might need more references despite my giving you the benefit of the coolness doubt.

  14. I found you when you commented on 2 of my blogs today and I'm completly addicted now! I love your blog! Now following and I think I'm going to follow some of your faves too!

  15. Hahaha, hilarious! Sorry - was it meant to be??!! Sounds like you're SO ready to come searching Green Island for my partner's hat with me ... (your comment on my blog, in case this makes no sense!) - have an awesome rest-of-weekend!!

  16. ---I love the "I dig your blog!"
    And I dig yours. I do. Very cool. xx

  17. Thanks for the follow. And don't worry, nude beach story coming up soon!

  18. Stopping by from Comment Love day! I'm off to check out some of the blogs you wrote about, they look like fun!

  19. Hey!
    Thank you for visiting my blog and thank you for introducing me to so many new blogs I didn't know until now!

  20. EmptyNester- Thanks for stopping by. Your daughters are all gorgeous btw. Doesn't seem right for one family to get it all. ;)

    Wow- I'll give you references all right. Right up your ass! Okay, I don't really even know what that means. I'll get back to you when I've thought up a real retort.

    Mrs. Mommy- Two of your blogs?? What an overachiever I am! They were both worth the read and I'll be stopping by again. Thanks for checking mine out. :)

    Red Nomad Oz- I AM ready! That continent is on my list of must see's before I croak. Yep. The ENTIRE continent.

  21. My Inner Chick- :) And I dug the tribute to your sister.

    Crystal- Thanks for stopping and I hope you enjoy the others as much as I do.

    coffeerocketfairytale- Wow your name is a mouthful. And that's not meant to sound dirty. I'm glad you stopped by. Thank you. :)

  22. I don't think I could say it more eloquently than Bamatrav.
    You're awesome and deserve all the blog love thrown your way...even if that love is in the form of pickles fighting ovens (what? What's weird about that?).
    Congrats on the success and I'll be suing you for copywrite infringement soon enough.

  23. I thought it was yellow...

  24. Hahaha! I love when people are real and don't sugar coat stuff, lol.. Funny enough I too, can touch my tongue to my nose and wiggle my ears, LoL!


  25. must try out..
    Bdw lets follow each other

  26. So glad you joined in, and I know some people found this great read :) Hope you had a great weekend!

  27. :-) I am enjoying it here. Via the Lady Blogger Social Tea Party. I will be back!

  28. Pickleope is uber funny. And I love the fact that you were born a Gremlin. Wait...

  29. Love the drawings!

  30. I've only read a couple of your posts so far but I love your writing style!

    Following <3

  31. I have to silent held in sneeze that no one can hear. Someday my head will explode off my head.

  32. Bamatrav- As does mine Bam. *sigh* As does mine.

    Pickelope- I feel like giving you a big hug but for some reason it just feels dirty to wanna hug a pickle. I haven't worked out the why of it quite yet.

    Anonymous- What was yellow? I'm confused.

    Lorena- If you ask my Mom, I could use a little more sugar coating in my life. Congrats! We should run away to the circus together.

    Chulala- You must.

    TexaGermaNadian- Looking forward to the next one. I like that sort of hop. :)

    Vidya Sury- I hope so! I stopped by your profile. Which one is your main blog?

  33. ABFTS- Isn't he though? You guys aren't too shabby yourselves. Brainsicles indeed. That whole post was horrifying. In a totally awesome way.

    Jessica- I agree. They both made my day.

    Dakota- :) Thanks. And I like Hello Kitty although I have to admit I've never seen so much of it in one place before.

    Mrs. Tuna- I just pictured us sitting together in your class. You silently wrecking your innards while I'm blowing them out every orifice on my head. If THAT doesn't make us the cool kids, then I just don't know what would.

  34. This is Tara. I thought the car was yellow. That's all. It was taking too long to log in.

  35. Wait, what's wrong with hugging a Pickle...OOOooOOoohhh. Wait, there's horns that makes it not dirty, right? Damn, it makes it worse, doesn't it? Crap.

  36. Your post'll ask you that after a few drinks when my nerve is up ;)


  37. I's 'll random all ovah yo' face, baybuh !

  38. Dude, seriously, random is the only way to be. I applaud it! That and drawings of people done in Paint or Photoshop. Awesome. I haven't done one in ages, I must rectify this. Also you fancy lady with your awards. It's like the Oscars of Awesome only with less showy frocks and bitches.

  39. PS I apologize that I thought I had "followed" you and added you to my reader AGES ago and just realized, damn, no I didn't because I have the attention span of a small fish.

  40. Tara- Thanks for being a total creeper.

    Pickelope- It makes it monumentally worse. And exponentially more painful. Dirty.

    Bamatrav- Liquid courage gets me through most of my days. But what the crap is "WV:light"? Promoting the lights of West Virginia? I'm sure they're just delightful this time of year.

    Lil Nigglet- Neat.

    Veggie Assassin- You absolutely SHOULD rectify that. Even if only to use the word rectify again because it reminds of rectum and that makes me giggle.
    I never knew you had any intention of following me but I'm delighted that you are now. Puny attention span and all. :)

  41. But I'm so glad I got there in the end. I mean the ginja army needs to stick together, no?

    Plus, it's damn fun over here!

  42. Born in a Gremlin? Love it. I was conceived in a VW bug. Those are some flexible parents, right there.

  43. WV is Word Verification. Sometimes people write it. The word verification for my comment to be published was :light. I live in Alabama :P

  44. Nice pics! And Natalie is indeed the trifecta of are you!

  45. I just read your feature/birth story post. YIKES! Do you accept "happy" birthdays? :)

  46. Well thank you lovely lady! I would've been on to say thanks much earlier but as you rightly said I hardly ever go on my blog!

    Nah in actual fact it is because I've just been in Spain for a week and they didn't have wi-fi on the beach. Plus even when I did check my emails I didn't see your message cause for some reason yours always go to my spam email! Don't hotmail realise you are one of my best and favourite commenters and sticking you in spam is just wrong and rude? I won't let them beat us.

    Rapunzel x

    ps Like the Vegetable Assassin I thought I was following you too. Ah better late than never.

  47. Veggie Assassin- Absolutely! You read Mandy-Fish's post on redheaded sperm donors. If there were ever a case of genocide, this sounds like it to me!

    Dawn- Seriously? Mad props to the parentals. It makes my hip hurt just thinking about it.

    Bamatrav- Oh right! I need to figure out how to turn that off. It drives me nuts when trying to comment on others blogs. Alabama Travis? Am I close? The stars fell on you there or something right?

    Ixy- Aww shucks. :)

    KY- I KNOW right? And yes, actually, I do. I need all the happy reminders on that day I can get. ;)

    Rapunzel- Damn you hot mail! Damn you straight to hell! *shakes fist in righteous fury* Glad you found it in your spam mail. :)

  48. I've just spent the better part of my early morning/late evening catching up on what is by far one of the funniest blogs I've read in a while.

    Thanks for stopping by and humoring me with the owl skirt love. I'm sure that my daughter will hate what I've chosen to put her in in her young age later in life.

    I'm clicking that follow button too, just for good measure!

  49. N. Nicholes- You seriously just made my night. :)

  50. Girl-
    I thought I knew what sarcasm was...and then I read your blog. You're awesome and hilarious and will most definitely be blog-stalked by me from this point forward.